Comments on: Your contribution to a “Reader on African Sexualities” http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html We think there is a serious lack of relevant and useful information about the sexuality of African women. This blog is a space for African women to share tips, experiences and more... Tue, 07 Feb 2012 20:09:01 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Anonymous http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-707 Anonymous Thu, 28 May 2009 13:30:36 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-707 @ Esi, who said u are a virgin! :)<br /><br />on a crazy note, i wonder how guys wud be tested 4 virginity. would they insert a spatula in our behinds!! Man I'm scared. :) @ Esi, who said u are a virgin! :)

on a crazy note, i wonder how guys wud be tested 4 virginity. would they insert a spatula in our behinds!! Man I’m scared. :)

]]> By: Nana http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-704 Nana Wed, 27 May 2009 21:16:49 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-704 @Shane - I love the way you expand the conversations, lol...I had not thought of lines between virgin/non virgin and using toys for penetration and not a penis. Does the post on the subject of virgins and virginity address some of these questions? @Shane – I love the way you expand the conversations, lol…I had not thought of lines between virgin/non virgin and using toys for penetration and not a penis. Does the post on the subject of virgins and virginity address some of these questions?

]]> By: Shane http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-695 Shane Fri, 22 May 2009 07:53:54 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-695 I agree with Nana's last response to Pen Powder. I don't think the concept of virginity should be defined in a purely physiological sense, i.e. broken hymen. On the other hand, the approach I am proposing begs the question of where to draw the line between virgin/non-virgin. Does oral sex count? What if a couple uses toys for penetration and not an actual penis, etc? See where I'm going with this? I agree with Nana’s last response to Pen Powder. I don’t think the concept of virginity should be defined in a purely physiological sense, i.e. broken hymen. On the other hand, the approach I am proposing begs the question of where to draw the line between virgin/non-virgin. Does oral sex count? What if a couple uses toys for penetration and not an actual penis, etc? See where I’m going with this?

]]> By: Nana http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-693 Nana Thu, 21 May 2009 22:50:13 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-693 @Darian - Yep, I would think it is not the most romantic way to "loose" your virginity. Hey, maybe I should write a post on how did you "loose" your virginity<br /><br />@Esi - Erm...I'm guessing not :)<br /><br />@Anon - I am hoping that you haven't been back to the Ob/Gyn because you have had no need to and not because you were put off from your first visit<br /><br />@Abena - Sis, you know if I don't have any children its because you have put me off pregnancy right? :)<br /><br />@Pen Powder - No, I don't think I would have been a different person at all. I don't think my hymen (or lack of one) defines me as a person at all. I don't think you would actually realise if you "lost" your hymen through sports, etc...I think the first time you have sex would be always uncomfortable whether you have a hymen or not @Darian – Yep, I would think it is not the most romantic way to “loose” your virginity. Hey, maybe I should write a post on how did you “loose” your virginity

@Esi – Erm…I’m guessing not :)

@Anon – I am hoping that you haven’t been back to the Ob/Gyn because you have had no need to and not because you were put off from your first visit

@Abena – Sis, you know if I don’t have any children its because you have put me off pregnancy right? :)

@Pen Powder – No, I don’t think I would have been a different person at all. I don’t think my hymen (or lack of one) defines me as a person at all. I don’t think you would actually realise if you “lost” your hymen through sports, etc…I think the first time you have sex would be always uncomfortable whether you have a hymen or not

]]> By: Anonymous http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-692 Anonymous Thu, 21 May 2009 16:58:07 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-692 Well Esi,...if I was to play Devil's Advocate for a sec...look at it this way, my Mum probably figured she'd kill two birds with one stone.<br /><br />My sis and I 'were' afflicted and needed the exam, so why not satisfy her curiosity while she was at it.<br /><br />I wonder though what she might have done had it backfired on her and either of us turned out to have been active...now that would be one traumatic teenage experience explaining to your typical Ghanaian Mum (after the countless and endlessly horrific sex-lectures) whom you were sexing and 'for what two reasons'. Well Esi,…if I was to play Devil’s Advocate for a sec…look at it this way, my Mum probably figured she’d kill two birds with one stone.

My sis and I ‘were’ afflicted and needed the exam, so why not satisfy her curiosity while she was at it.

I wonder though what she might have done had it backfired on her and either of us turned out to have been active…now that would be one traumatic teenage experience explaining to your typical Ghanaian Mum (after the countless and endlessly horrific sex-lectures) whom you were sexing and ‘for what two reasons’.

]]> By: Pen Powder http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-691 Pen Powder Thu, 21 May 2009 07:55:40 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-691 If she had not asked, and you had gone ahead to have the test, and consequently losing your virgity in that manner, do you think you would have been a different person? I ask because there are men who do not believe virginity can be lost in this way, or through sport etc. If you would, I would be curious to know what could dig about this, or even just a survey of how many women have actually lost their virginity in similar circumstances. If she had not asked, and you had gone ahead to have the test, and consequently losing your virgity in that manner, do you think you would have been a different person? I ask because there are men who do not believe virginity can be lost in this way, or through sport etc. If you would, I would be curious to know what could dig about this, or even just a survey of how many women have actually lost their virginity in similar circumstances.

]]> By: lovelylind http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-690 lovelylind Thu, 21 May 2009 05:54:43 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-690 Congrats on your pregnancy, Abena! Wow @ your doctor. Part of me wants to chuckle, but at the same time, no time for jokes when I'm in such a vulnerable position. lol <br /><br />I guess I'm kinda uptight. :) Congrats on your pregnancy, Abena! Wow @ your doctor. Part of me wants to chuckle, but at the same time, no time for jokes when I’m in such a vulnerable position. lol

I guess I’m kinda uptight. :)

]]> By: Abena Gyekye http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-689 Abena Gyekye Wed, 20 May 2009 15:56:04 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-689 I recently went to the OB/GYN to get a routine check up since these are the last weeks of my pregnancy. I laid on my back and let him do his little swab thing. Since it's summer in Georgia, I had been sweating profusely and hadn't had time to cool down before my examination so I was dreading his reaction. It was the quickest swab I've ever had. <br /><br />"That's it? You're done?" I asked. "Well, yeah," said the male doc. "Unless you and your friends want me to hang out for longer..."<br /><br />He was making a reference to my three LARGE hemorrhoids. No mention of my sweaty thighs what-so-ever! I recently went to the OB/GYN to get a routine check up since these are the last weeks of my pregnancy. I laid on my back and let him do his little swab thing. Since it’s summer in Georgia, I had been sweating profusely and hadn’t had time to cool down before my examination so I was dreading his reaction. It was the quickest swab I’ve ever had.

“That’s it? You’re done?” I asked. “Well, yeah,” said the male doc. “Unless you and your friends want me to hang out for longer…”

He was making a reference to my three LARGE hemorrhoids. No mention of my sweaty thighs what-so-ever!

]]> By: Esi W. Cleland http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-688 Esi W. Cleland Wed, 20 May 2009 11:45:27 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-688 man, anonymous, that's some crazy s***. ur mom must have been really paranoid. I can see myself being a little curious abt whether my kids are having sex or not but i don't think i'd go that far. man, anonymous, that’s some crazy s***. ur mom must have been really paranoid. I can see myself being a little curious abt whether my kids are having sex or not but i don’t think i’d go that far.

]]> By: Anonymous http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-687 Anonymous Tue, 19 May 2009 17:36:00 +0000 http://adventuresfrom.com/2009/05/17/your-contribution-to-a-reader-on-african-sexualities.html#comment-687 Only ever been to see an OBGYN once in my life, I must have been about fifteen. My mum took my sister and I because we kept getting this persistent yeast infection.<br /><br />Well...this Gynae lady (very pleasant, I recall) and her nurse (not as affable) poked and prodded but could not get their numbingly cold instrument as much as a centimeter in. So they gave up after the third try and just took a swabbed sample.<br /><br />This whole psuedo-exam left me hurting some. <br /><br />My mother and the friendly doctor lady had a private chat afterwards. Till this day I still think my Mum just wanted the 411 on whether or not my sis and I were still 'unspoiled'. I mean, why the hussle for just a swipe? Only ever been to see an OBGYN once in my life, I must have been about fifteen. My mum took my sister and I because we kept getting this persistent yeast infection.

Well…this Gynae lady (very pleasant, I recall) and her nurse (not as affable) poked and prodded but could not get their numbingly cold instrument as much as a centimeter in. So they gave up after the third try and just took a swabbed sample.

This whole psuedo-exam left me hurting some.

My mother and the friendly doctor lady had a private chat afterwards. Till this day I still think my Mum just wanted the 411 on whether or not my sis and I were still ‘unspoiled’. I mean, why the hussle for just a swipe?

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