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Ask Adventurers: Why is it so hard for a lesbian to date in Accra?

Hi Adventurers, this is a short query from a reader. I’m hoping you can help her and offer some tips and advice. Over to you:

“I’m 25 years and a lesbian. and i was wondering if u had any idea why it so hard finding a decent date in accra”

Thoughts? Suggestions? What should she do?

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Published on: 09 May 2014 by in Lesbian, Relationships

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24 Comments
  1. Nnenna says:

    This should have been discussed in the forums.

    • Nana Darkoa says:

      Madam Forum police is back!

      On the real though, does anyone ever use the forums? I barely remember that it’s there? Why is that the case? Do w need to make it a tab on the site and more prominent somehow. Or should we just say it’s not working and allow it to die….

  2. More prominent tab. Me thinks.

  3. Nnenna says:

    We need to make people realise that it is there and push for involvement. For issues like the above the forum is the best bet. Otherwise it reflects badly on the site when people do not answer it. We’ve had 4 comments now. None are about the issue raised.

    Plus there, people no not have to feel like the whole site is watching them if they want to discuss more intimate matters…And maybe Accra lesbian lurkers might feel more inclined to respond.

  4. Tomi says:

    I have an answer to the issue at hand but I don’t know if I should leave it here or on the forum…

    • Nana Darkoa says:

      Please leave it here for now 🙂 I’ve noted the need for us to use the forum and also to make the tab more prominent… In the meantime a sister is waiting for our advise 🙂

  5. JamezBondina says:

    Following the thread (sorry I can’t speak to the issue @ hand), I only glance at the forums when I have the full site up. Adventures is bookmarked on my phone.

  6. Madame says:

    I’ve been wondering too. if anyone finds the answer to the sister’s question do let me know. .. *it’s so hard finding a decent, honest and genuine lesbian date*

  7. Nana Darkoa says:

    My thoughts are for obvious reasons lesbians in Ghana are not usually open/out with their sexuality…so even on a basic level its hard to tell who is lesbian, whether you can ‘safely’ approach them etc…

  8. Let me help tackle this.
    One night after work, I didn’t expect to stay late so there was no reservation for me. I had to share a room with a lesbian…She was from Gabon. The rest of the group had been teasing her boyish ways for a long time but I knew straight away she was Lesbian..
    After I took my shower, she asked if I was lesbian. I said no. Then I asked if she was. Her response was very defensive ”What if I am?”
    I smiled, and said, ”Honey, I judge nobody except those who harm others”

    She opened up and we had the longest conversation.
    she said her main problem in Ghana is finding dates.
    she said there are many, many lesbians in Ghana but you know what keeps them in the closet? society.
    she even has a Ghanaian girlfriend but this girlfriend will not openly love her. not before friends, not before her parents because it is unacceptable in Ghana! So most lesbians end up being bi and keeping boyfriends along with girlfriends. something that pissed her off because in her country lesbians do not hide their sexuality behind cheating. ”How do I share my girl with a man, isn’t that cheating? ” she asked. because their parents expect them to be normal. because nobody even knows they are lesbian! that is mainly why it is so difficult to find Lesbian dates in Ghana.
    I still hahve her number…

  9. Malaka says:

    Thinking about the lesbians in our boarding schools right now. Nana actually blogged about this years ago. Girls in our school systems have same sex relationships within school walls and then have heterosexual relationships when they graduate because we’re all conditioned to.

    I hate to make this suggestion for fear of sounding “some way”, but if she wants a date, she might consider visiting a local high school and playing “my supi.”
    Hey. Guys do it. All she needs is a flashy car and a nice cell! The gurls will come running.

    A more helpful idea might be to visit Jamestown. I understand there is a very open gay/lesbian community there and no one minds.

    • Purple T. says:

      Supi!! Hahaha! The truth is, they do date each other in secondary schools, come out, marry men and continue hanging with and sexing up the ‘Best Friend’ who is their true and preferred lover.
      I cannot stand the pretentious Ghanaian.
      we act so holy, so morally upright, so pious! and yet so ugly behind closed doors.
      i always think it’s this nature of Ghanaians that breeds so much sexual abuse and perversion. the bottling up is dangerous.

  10. Jegga says:

    Am a Nigerian in search of a good Ghana lady to have sex with at anytime, Am good in bed and for Lesbians..Have got Friends but i do not disclose easily..Just caution keeping

  11. Jegga says:

    I live at Spintex, Adogono Just in case for contacts..Facebook/ Jegga chillz

  12. ken Kofi says:

    Lesbian dating in Accra?
    its easy if you know where to get it. I have a list of lesbians on my list because of the kind of work i do.
    I sell sex toys

  13. ayi says:

    we live in a society where they dont respect our feeling

  14. Sel says:

    What happened to the forums?

    • Nana Darkoa says:

      Hmmm @Sel. So we changed website hosts…and our new hosts are expensive and at the moment we cannot afford to pay for the technical support so we lost some functionality – as you may have realised Malaka and I do not make money from Adventures so we really can’t afford to pay too much for bells and whistles unless we get it in the form of sponsorship which is what we had with our previous web hosts – but we kept having issues with the site crushing etc so eventually had to move. One of our readers was recently very helpful with fixing a technical issue we have, and I think we need to build a small pool of tech savvy Adventures users who are happy to do this sort of stuff for us on a pro bono basis. So any pros at word press, holla at us

  15. Rossy says:

    Am a bisexual and forced to hide my sexuality because it isnt acceptable in Ghana

  16. Rossy says:

    Am bisexual and proud

  17. Leen says:

    I totally agree its super difficult to find a date

  18. mimi says:

    I would like to meet a honest partner.

  19. Aba says:

    I have also been searching for an older woman to date. Its so hard to find one. I’m a young lady in my early 20s. Please hook me up if you’re available. xxx.

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