Maybe I’m reading too much into things but some of the responses in some of the articles on this website really struck me with the apparent deep convictions of those who engaged in premarital sex that what they did made them fall short in the eyes of god. The very words used to describe their experiences were quite instructive, particularly the word “impure.” I’ve long known this word to be linked to sexual interaction but it’s always sobering to see it still wielding the power it did all through the centuries. Sexual interaction, including intercourse, is by far a most wonderful way of expressing one’s love …

I promised Nana to write an article for her blog over two years ago. Since then, many things have happened.  At the time, we were at Nana’s house, with this dashing young lady from America with Ugandan blood flowing in her veins. At the risk of objectifying her, I will say she was a looker, the kind that makes you want to go down on your knees and promise her the world, including learning the Kazkh  language. After a wonderful chat, I asked of her two days later, Nana told me that she had asked if I was gay.
Now this will shatter any strapping heterosexual man’s ego. But it was supposed to be a compliment. …

It’s been a while since I ‘spent some time with my man’ if you know what I mean and we’ve all been looking forward to it. And then I start feeling a slight discomfort in my beautiful vagina and I think oh oh oh  -  is that an infection coming up?!!!
So I rush to the pharmacy and try to tell the usually male pharmacist to get me something that works fast! Then he launches into why it’s better to take the three day treatment to make sure the infection clears completely and so on and I’m thinking man, can I have a two hour treatment if it’s possible? I’ve got a sexy man coming over …

I am hoping to do a series of these interviews with diverse African women. If you are interested in answering these questions (I might switch up the questions to keep the interviews interesting) please send me an email via adventuresfrom[at]gmail.com . It will be great if you could give me a brief ‘sex’ bio so I can decide how best to structure the interview. Let me know your thoughts on the interview in the comments box.
NS: What does sexuality mean to you?
Ms. Choclit: Sexuality is the full expression of my vagina! My sexuality is all about pussy power.
NS: How would you define your sexual orientation?
Ms. Choclit: Oriented to have fun! Hehe. I would identify as …

I read Darian’s article Good Christian Girls Don’t Have Sex and was struck by her sincerity and her conviction. Now I personally do not subscribe to abstinence and notions of “saving” oneself for marriage or until you find that special The One. I did hold such beliefs at one time; my Christian upbringing impressed upon me that premarital sex was sinful so that even though as a male I was culturally conditioned to be the sexual aggressor, the teachings of my faith held even more sway. I did, however, eventually reject it, even before I became fully socially and historically conscious. Having fully understood now the cultural …

It has been a few minutes after 5:50pm, i.e. if you’re to assume the clock on the hallway wall is accurate. The psych group in the adjoining room left not long ago, and although you’re glad for the tranquility, you now realize you miss the need to concentrate their presence necessitated. It has also been about 8 hours since your morning econ class, and you reckon you’ve plowed through 600 pages of reading all things religion- from Mahayana Buddhism, to convoluted Sikh texts, to the Venerable Bede and 7th century English Monasticism. Why you thought taking three demanding religion courses is even too great a question for your acutely fried brain to process. You’re now …

A few weeks ago one of the regular ‘commenters’ on this blog brought my attention to a particular conundrum. How can a man tell if a woman’s had an orgasm? Short of asking her of course which can sometimes come across as a bit gauche. True, I thought, ‘how can a man tell if a woman has climaxed?’, not everyone comes loudly (in fact I’m willing to bet that the majority of women come fairly quietly). This question then made me think ‘What if all the times I have not ‘cum’ the guy hasn’t been able to figure it out which is why he doesn’t do anything about it?’. Oh my goodness, that’s a horrible …

Wow! In a few days time it will be Adventures’s 2nd anniversary and what an exciting two years this has been. I have had so many positive experiences with Adventures -  which has included meeting new people, growing more confident in my own sexuality and writing for the likes of Dust Magazine and Dream Weddings. Its been a wonderful 2 year journey and I thank all of you for being on this journey with us. I especially want to thank all our contributors – those I know and those who are complete strangers to me.  I want to thank you for your honesty, your openness and your generosity in sharing your stories without fear. I …

One of my friends totally cracked me up a few minutes ago. We have a pre-birthday dinner date arranged (I’ll be turning 33 in a few days time) and I texted him to re-schedule because another friend has decided to treat me to an overnight stay in a resort outside Accra. So of course he jumps to assumptions and sends me this text back:
“Hmmm. Weekend in x sounds like a Sugar Daddy to me…”
My response:
“Hahahaha. It’s not a Sugar Daddy kraa. I don’t have one o…”
His response:
“ Every beautiful young lady deserves at least one Sugar Daddy to run circles around. Soon it will no longer be an option, so enjoy before you are forced …

I spent a lot of time last week thinking about orgasms. Specifically I found myself thinking, ‘what does it take to have a “mind blowing orgasm”.
I love that phrase, “mind blowing orgasm”. It reminds me of a dear friend who one described sex between herself and a boyfriend as ‘mind blowing’. My mind was blown at that description. Wow! Sex could be mind-blowing? I guess I wasn’t having mind-blowing sex at that time…
So the question that I decided to ask one of my close friends last week was…’What conditions needs to be in place for you to have a mind-blowing orgasm?’ And her response was:

Talking dirty/spanking/porn
Sufficiently aroused (lubricated)
No pressure like I have to validate someone …