I turned 33 two days ago and spent the day with my friend [who happens to be a Doctor – her profession is very relevant to this post 🙂 ] So Dr and I natter about everything. We have a lot in common. Especially when it comes to the subject of children. We are not overjoyed at the thought of having children. In a previous post I wrote about my fear of childbirth so I won’t go into that here but there have been some developments in my views on childbirth. I have decided that it would be ‘safer’ to have one child as an insurance policy against future regret. A few years ago I attended a Feminist Tech Exchange in South Africa and I will always remember this older feminist who said her one regret was not having a child. ‘How horrible,’ I thought, ‘to regret having children at a stage when you cannot do anything about that regret‘. I don’t want to have that regret. I don’t want to regret anything in my life which is where my one child insurance policy comes through. If I have just one biological child then surely I would have no regrets. One child shouldn’t change my life that much should it? I mean, I can just pack my one child and go wherever I want to go. Its not like having 3 or 4 children. Now that will definitely change my life. Now Dr freaked me out a bit. She said. ‘ when you look at the charts of women over 35 who have children, the rates of Down’s syndrome go up exponentially’. Shoot! So now I have to meet my baby’s father in the early part of this year so I can get to know them for a couple of months, conceive my child very late this year or very early next year so I can just about beat the 35 year old deadline? Pressure be what? Especially when there are no prospectives in sight?
Well Dr and I decided to draw up a shopping list for my baby’s father:
* Earns at least $3,000 per month
* Enjoys what he does for a living
* In an ideal world would be a feminist or at least have a healthy respect for women’s rights and social justice issues
* Is tolerant/liberal minded
* Physically fit/exercises on a regular basis
* Circumcised (or willing to be circumcised)
* AA (not a sickle cell carrier, cos I am one)
* Good looking (yes I know that depends on the beholder)
So if you fit the bill, or know anyone who fits the bill have them email me via adventuresfrom[at]gmail.com. Lets see if Adventures can find me my baby’s father.
P.S: Oh and I’m not looking for a sperm donor. I’m looking unconventionally for an almost conventional type of relationship. To quote some of the dating ads ‘searching for friendship and possibly more‘.