‘Proper Fucking’ by Guest Contributor Ebuwa Igho-Osagie

Bastard! These men think they can just call women and say whatever they want! Fool! Bastard! “Baby, I want to give us a try, once again…” God!

She wished he had made that statement in person. She would have bitten off his lips. …His lips… Those full, delicious lips…. No! That fool! Shalewa was so angry, she wanted to turn off the semovita she was stirring on the stove. She remembered the first day she met Eric. She should have known that he was this kind of person, the hit and run kind. He was so cool, so detached from people, but serious about life in a weird way. He had entered the keke napep with his fat friend and mentioned in their conversation that he was too tipsy to drive home. Huh? That one had gotten her attention. Anyone who knows they’re too drunk to drive is most likely not drunk enough.

“Where are you going?”

Fat people are so disgusting! Why is this one asking me questions? Fat people! Julius, her soon to be ex-lover had recently become fat. Chicken change that his Oga was paying him had gotten to his brain. He had, just some moments ago, thrown her out. Men are such bastards.

“If you are going to second avenue, don’t pay, we have change for three.”

This one’s voice was light, almost musical. Mr. Too-drunk-to-drive. He was cute too. Silence.

“I’m going to Second Avenue”

“So we are going to the same place perhaps”

Who cares where this one is going. But he said it with a smile. Nice smile. She smiled back.

“Maybe”

“Maybe? I’m going to my house ooo. Abi you are going to my house with me?”

He smiled. She was very upset that night but his voice was eccentrically soothing. His joke did not stir any offence. Actually if he had meant his offer a little more, she would have said yes. Gwagwalada was too far to return to so late at night, and that anofia had just thrown her out.

Nowhere to go; she had loitered around Second Avenue. Did Sumbo really live on this street? It did not look familiar ooo. Which house did she say she lived for God’s sake.

 

“Hello. Are you lost?”

Mr. Too drunk’s voice had become familiar during the keke ride. Was this good news? She would take the chance.

“I think I’m lost. I cannot find my friend’s house and I’m stranded. It’s too late to go back to Gwagwalada”.

His fat friend lived on Second Avenue. He had gone to pick some stuff up. His house was just off the street and was within walking distance. If she did not mind…

 

His place was a one-bed ensuite. Very typical for the Gwarimpa area of Abuja. He had made her a warm cup of tea and poured himself some wine. He disappeared into the kitchen and came back with a steaming toast sandwich. Wetin this one fit cook, she thought, and then she bit into it. Really nice, there was some chicken in it somewhere. His place was relaxing. There was a feminine touch to it. She began to unwind. This fellow is a rogue; she thought to herself. How can anyone seem so flippant but put together at the same time. Or maybe it was the wine. He probably was very together when sober.

 

She began watching him as he took off his shoes and placed them on a rack after scratching off some dirt. She watched him take off his shirt and was a little disappointed that he had a vest underneath. She caught herself staring as he began to take off his trousers in the corner…

 

She had come from Gwagwalada to get some money from Julius and for some proper fucking as she liked to call it. School had been challenging that week and there was something about a tough school week that always made her feel the need for a great round of sex. But her little fight with that nincompoop had left her with neither. He caught her staring as he turned around and reached for a towel.

 

“I can take it off if you wan see ooo” He said tugging at his boxer briefs.

“Mscheew”

 

Was that bulge a mini erection or his thing at resting potential? He started walking towards her with a shameless smile on his face. Up close, his pelvic region was at her eye level, close to her face as she was sitting. Perfume. Sky blue shorts. That bulge. She pushed him away but held him back at the end of the push. Her breathing changed. This was what she had come to town for; wasn’t it? She looked up into his eyes. He laughed, pulled her up gently, pulled her to himself. That bulge was now a full, hard erection. She tried to pull away but moaned lightly as he placed her hand just below his navel. She moved her fingers lower and felt his penis throb. She wouldn’t kiss him, that beer mouth. His lips were on her neck as she moved her face and mouth to the side. He moved them slowly then whispered in her ear “how’s it going baby?” She mumbled something. Who asks such a silly question at a time like this? She found herself kicking off her jeans and panties as they fell softly unto the bed. He kissed the front of her neck, then went downwards. Kissed one nipple then the next. Sucked the left breast, then continued downward. What of the right one? He kissed just beneath her navel and her abdominal muscles quivered. Would he go down already. He was titillating her, tantalizing every bit of her very horny state. She quivered some more and spread her legs, ankles pulling up under her knees. Up he came. Sucking gently at the right breast. She didn’t care anymore if he went down. Where was….. Oooh! She gasped as his throbbing penis entered the inner santuary. Slow, deep, timely. In and out. Rhythm. Pleasure. Bliss.

 

That was how their ‘relationship’ started. Undefined, but it made her happy. Every time she had a party in town or had to visit a customer, she would spend the night. Eric had a method to his lovemaking. It was always special. She began to hope that every week spent in school would present one challenge or another. Then her weekends would be filled with maximum pleasure! Then out of the blue he called her. He was traveling to Bauchi. “When will you be back?” “Two months time.” “When are you travelling?” “Sunday”. “So I will see you this weekend?” “No.” Then the line went dead. No call back, no returned calls, nothing. For three and half months.

 

She would rather die than see that fool again. Who the hell did he think he was? Why give him another chance to play with her feelings. She became wet the times they had shared together, she became conscious of the fact that theirs hadn’t been a real relationship. She fucked Aristos at the after parties she came to town for – that was business, and slept with Eric for pleasure – but she had become really fond of him. She couldn’t blame him per se. She had no right to claim him. Hmmn, she sighed. Maybe she should see him. After all her project was giving her so much stress and there was a party in Gwarimpa this weekend. She would need a place to stay. She would also like some proper fucking if Eric hadn’t abandoned his skills. She took her half burnt semovita off the stove and began looking for her phone where she had flung it.

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