Nana, can you imagine that Auntie Rose came to town today? It’s the worst possible timing. I am flying tomorrow to Berlin to meet up with Kofi. I am desperate for some good action and now I just have to hope that Auntie Rose leaves town in 3 days.
Ah, but Ama what are you talking about? You guys can still get it on.
I know but Kofi refuses to have sex when I am on my period. I have tried to convince him that period sex is completely normal but the very idea of it freaks him out.
My friend and I had a version of the conversation above a few hours ago. I have had my own experience of being in a relationship with a man who was so freaked out when he saw blood on his dick after we had been fucking. At the time, he was my first lover, and his reaction, “oh my god, what is that? It’s an abomination! Did you know you were on your period?” in turn freaked me out, and for years meant that I refused to have sex whenever I was on my period. I now see that act – of refusing to have sex with a menstruating woman – as misogynistic, and a sign that said man has bought into age-old beliefs that regard women as dirty during their periods. Now why would I want to be with a man (or woman) who thinks that for 6 days of every month I am not clean enough to lie with?
I still have a lot of appreciation for a former boyfriend who went to great lengths to prove to me that I am desireable EVERY day of the month. Through him I came to realize that OMG, oral sex during my period is next level amazing. I guess all the hormones coursing through my body during that time are good for something after all. And yes, I know for some, your imagination has gone into overdrive now but let me help you dispel some of those Dracula inspired visions. There are many ways to have oral sex whilst menstruating, and still not get into any direct contact with blood! (Perhaps those who know how to do this can share their own tips and experiences in the comments below)
Nowadays I have a healthier attitude towards period sex (although I am not fully where I want to get to yet). Day 4 of my period is usually a good day for me to get jiggy – my flow is light, and I’m not worried about turning my white sheets a vibrant shade of red. I am not a huge fan of sex in the shower but on heavier days, doggy style in the bathroom also works wonders. There’s no risk of messing up the sheets, and you can hop into the shower straight afterwards.
I’m curious to know more about other people’s experiences of period sex. Do you love it? Have you got an unhealthy fear of period sex? How have previous partners reacted when you’ve wanted to have period sex? Let’s get chatting.