I’m a born again virgin. Well that’s how my friend E described me a few weeks ago ‘cos I seem to be going through the longest sexual drought that I have ever experienced. Now I’m very aware that my definition of a sexual drought may not be your definition of what constitutes a drought, but in my world it’s the Sahara. The last time I had ‘full on’ sex was in March this year, but since then its only been a few instances of oral sex with an ex and one of my special friends (in separate encounters I may add). Even my toys no longer seem as exciting…
So what’s accounted for this sexual drought?
Clearly not being in a relationship, and not having a buddy is one reason…not wanting random hook ups is another…not wanting to have sex with an ex is another…being too busy to f*#@ even makes the list.
A few weeks ago I spent some time in London. In anticipating my trip I also anticipated some mind-boggling sex cos in London I have waaayyyy too many people. There is the hot Cuban who gives the best oral ever, my ex long term buddy, my entrepreneurial ex colleague (people who can inspire me with their business acumen get me all hot and bothered), my significant ex (whom I had no intention of going there with), and at least 2 other solid options. Surely the drought would end in London? When I went lingerie shopping with my friend and bought a translucent fuchsia set she kept saying “Ah, you should save this lingerie for the night you break your virginity…”
So what went wrong?
The hot Cuban was the one I was most interested in going there with. I have many good memories of happy orgasms with him, and I knew he would do his special trick (he goes down on you, and doesn’t stop till you cum thrice). Even before I got to London I sent him a message via FB to say ‘Hey, I’ll be in your world soon’. And he responded saying ‘Call me! Its urgent’. Now that’s one of the disadvantages where C is concerned, he’s always broke so I am always the one who has to call him. To give him credit though he has never tried to sponge off me…so after a couple of days I called him:
Hey C, it’s Nana.
…Nanita, come and see me now. You should stay over. I have moved to a new place and I have my own room.
I can’t come and see you right now. I was just calling to let you know I’m in town. I’ll be in your area on Friday. I can come over then.
I might not be available on Friday
[Me thinking to myself: What? But you don’t have a job? You just told me that you’re waiting for your security guard badge. Just because I am not going to drop everything I’m doing to come over for some good head. Tsewww]
Okay. I’ll call you on Friday; if you’re available I’ll pass by…
Eventually I called on Monday when I had a meeting in his area. He didn’t pick up, and never responded to my voicemail.
In my mind I had a mental scoreboard. C was at the top of the list. Then there was N. N is a cutie which is kind of an incongruous way to describe him because he is a much older man. Three and a half years ago when we first hooked up he was about 46 I think. He still holds the record for being the oldest man I have ever hooked up with. But way before we hooked up we would chat for ages about business ideas. He was such an inspirational person to talk to. We had only hooked up once before so it kinda feels like we have some unfinished business.
N and I had tentatively planned to meet on Tuesday but when I hadn’t received confirmation from him by 9am on Tuesday, I made other plans. At about 10am he sends a text saying ‘See you at 5.30’. Ermmm, no you can’t. Aba! Do you think I’m just sitting there waiting for you? So we made plans for Thursday. On Thursday he wanted to reschedule for Friday. That was the end of plans with N.
Its like the Goddess didn’t want me to get some.
So I’m back home in Ghana now and the lovely translucent fuchsia bra remains in the lovely tissue the sales person wrapped it in.
My one exciting sexual purchase for myself (note self, cos my purchase for someone else is a whole other post) was a new anthology of lesbian erotica. Lesbian erotica is so hot! Who else think so? And what tips do you have a sex blogger in the midst of a sexual drought?