The title of this blog is a rearrangement of the International Planned Parenthood Federation’s Byline, 'From Choice, a World of Possibilities' as it is a byline I most identify with and within which I want to locate my thoughts on sex, sexuality and the aging woman!  I like the byline, it seems very innocuous, and we have even been challenged that it does not speak to people nor does it reflect clearly what we do at IPPF where I work, which ...  [Read more]

Dear Kwasi, Anytime that I want to leave you I hear my mother’s voice say “I know you’re a lawyer but make sure you don’t become one of those I-know-my-rights-women. Aboa pete dze ne kwasia pe nyinkyer”. You see, baby, I don’t want to become one of those I-know-my-rights-women.  I don’t want to be a ‘liberated woman’ who refuses to submit to the Eurocentric standard of beauty and so walks around in styles she claims are ...  [Read more]

For the past couple of weeks, I have been asking my friends that particular question during our conversations about sex. Now, when I ask that question I’m not talking about the act of sex in general. I am talking about triggers, the things that tip a person over the edge—you know, what me and my most-recent ex used to call the ‘Fiiiiniiish Himmmm!’ moves”. (Yes, you have to say it in the Mortal Kombat voice.) I mean, I think there ...  [Read more]

I bought my first B.O.B (battery-operated-boyfriend) when I was nineteen and in my first month of college. My friends and I went to the Red Light District and entered some sleazy sex shop owned by some greasy old man. I was a student and didn’t have a lot of money so I bought a twenty-dollar toy. It was a cheap, plastic, ribbed, purple, straight and relatively small. It smelt like blueberries. I was still a virgin and didn’t want to ...  [Read more]

My husband is a wonderful man and an excellent spouse. I’ve extolled his virtues on so many occasions that I’ve had to stop for fear of being accused of idol worship or braggadocio. After all, with 50-60% of all Christian marriages ending in divorce, wouldn’t it appear conceited for me to talk about how wonderful my husband is? What cockiness! I’ve openly discussed the issues that Marshall and I have had over the years, but I can ...  [Read more]

On Friday 29th March, 4 writer/poet friends (Nana Akosua Hanson, Nana Nyarko Boateng, Famia Nkansa and Kuukua Dzigbordi Yomekpe) and I, participated in an 'Adventures from the Bedrooms of African Women' discussion on 'Surviving Sexual Abuse' at AccraAlt's monthly Talk Party Series. This event took place at Passion's Cafe in Osu. The idea behind the discussion was simple. Participating writers/poets selected stories/poems they would like to ...  [Read more]

This is what he asked me as he traced the silky smoothness that had pooled beneath the bend of my knee and was dripping down the back of my calf. “Wet enough to make you feel like you could drown” I answered. “Wet enough to fill a bathtub so I can swim in it?” “I think so. But would you want to?” “I would. I would slather that pussy juice all over my body like lotion. Then I would lick it off every part of my body that ...  [Read more]

To read part 1 of this story please click here PART TWO Puckered lips and coitus “Let’s play a game called he shows, she shows,” John said, I bit down on my lower lip, puckered my lips, blew him a kiss and said “hmm yes lets.” He rose from the bed and unbuttoned his shirt and threw it at me, “your turn” he said. I sat up on the bed and slowly began to unbutton my shirt, when I was at the level of my bra band I flashed one ...  [Read more]

See there is nothing as earth-shattering as those sacred moments when you are wrapped in the smell and the wetness of another woman's pussy. You- all tongue and yearning, her- all moans of 'yes' and 'don't stop'.... But it never begins right there . If you want to feel a woman coming like a waterfall on your face you need to take your time. You need to begin when she is fully clothed and not even thinking about making love. She could be at ...  [Read more]

PART ONE First times and introductions The first time we met I was surprised, I expected my supervisor to be older with salt and pepper hair – our line of work doesn’t attract younger John Wayne types. When I walked into his office I was genuinely surprised but recovered quickly and grasped his hand in a firm shake and it was his turn to be surprised by the firmness of the handshake, it registered for a few seconds and was gone – ...  [Read more]