In an ideal world I like to stay friends with my ex. It doesn't make sense to me that you should stop talking/hanging out with someone when you've shared bodily fluids with them. But as we all know the world is far from ideal, and I think that a healthy break from a past lover can be a good thing when one or both parties still has 'feelings' of sort for the other person. Plus the temptation to have 'pity sex', or even just feel guilty and so end up having pity sex with your ex can be strong. Or just the memory of how good you guys were in bed together.
What do you guys think? Has it been easy for you to stay friends with your ex? Are there some exes you have managed to do that with successfully and others are a completely no go area?
Share, share, share.
6 comments On Video: Should you stay friends with your ex?
For me it all depends on how things end. I’m great friends with a few exes simply cos they were honest about where they wanted the relationship to go and acted maturely about it. No sneaky stuff to disrespect me. And things ended mutually.
There’s a particular one (very recent ex) I’d consider as a BIG NO-GO area although he keeps asking to stay friends. My reason? He’s a pathological liar! He can’t even PRETEND to be honest to me out of simple respect to me as a fellow human being. And he wants to be friends? C’mon!
Aaaand also cos we were super hot for each other all the time and more so in bed. Even when we were raving mad at each other. He was the most raunchy relationship I’ve had. So that’s definitely too close to keep.
If anger doesn’t keep us away from each other sexually then what will? Lol. Especially when it’s a “free-for-all” friendship? Chale. So I’d rather not keep him close. Too complicated mehn.
Good point tho Nana. Healthy distance is the best!
Am good friends with an ex , the switch was cool and mutual. We still good friends only we dont talk about certain things explicitly like before as thats expected cos of how we are now. Its never been awkward or disrespectful when we meet .. Its been comfortable.
Depends on the sexing abilities…. If he was a good fuck, stay best friends. You never know when you might need his tool.
Aunty Nana. I miss you. How are you?!
Hehehehehe @AM, I like your advice…but doesn’t that complicate life? Oh well, I guess life is complex right? AA I miss you too. I am really well, just been a tad too busy. It’s been a long time since you wrote something for us o
Hello again Nana and the rest of the group. It’s been a very long while since I replied or contributed anything to this amazing forum (you know how we men simply could never multi-task;) lol)
To answer the question I can say only from my own personal experience. My ex and I since December of last year are once again in regular contact with other and we are firm friends. She was hurt and very angry when I ended things years ago (back in ’98) but we both have profoundly changed and matured. She has her family and I have mine.
I must admit I have a sneaking suspicion, based on certain things she said, that she wants us to sleep together again, even if just once. Even though I am very clear and confident now about my sexuality now — which I was not back then — and though she knows I do not subscribe to the idea of exclusive monogamy, I really don’t want to go down that road again with her. I mean the sex was awesome but still….I’ve learned to trust my instincts and something just doesn’t sit right.
NOPE. But then again, for a long time I was on a self-destructive streak and I only attracted people who took advantage of my self-loathing.
So no. Fuck’em.