My #Afrifem sister @Zawadi Nyongo wrote ‘Is it time for a nipple revolution‘ and that’s set me thinking about my own nipples and the breasts they are attached to. My nipples rarely give me sexual pleasure, they feel too sensitive. Sometimes its bearable to have them suckled. Sometimes that feels pleasurable. More often than not I would rather my nipples were not touched. Feel free to skip the boobies entirely in any ‘main play’ action. Yet my boobs have often been the part of my body that has been the most sexualised in my lifetime. I remember walking through the market as a pre teen and someone carelessly touching my breasts and saying ‘bobby stan up’ (a reference to upright breasts), in the past I have had older male work colleagues grab my breasts in passing (whenever occurrences like this took place I was often too surprised to react). In more recent times when men have grabbed a part of my body I grab their penis – my reaction really depends on my mood, but still this ability to just reach out and invade someone’s body without invitation always surprises me, and my reaction is often not satisfactory to me.
So back to nipples and boobs. Today I’m wearing a light summery dress and underneath that no bra. I feel very comfortable. Yet if I was to walk to the shop next door to buy a packet of milk I will instantly feel uncomfortable. I know that the guy next door who looks at me a little too long will look at me even longer. The shop owner next door might do a harumph – I can’t forget that after the night I got burgled her reaction was, “oh, I heard them open the gate o, but I thought it was one of your visitors”. And then there are my own issues. My G cup boobs are no longer booby stan up. It’s more bobby lying down – the left one lying down further down my chest than the right. I have sometimes paradoxically been envious of women with small boobs who can wear backless outfits, and simultaneously pleased with my huge mammary glands because its one of the parts of my body that corresponds to what society says is desirable in a woman. That’s all kinds of fucked up isn’t it?
14 comments On Much ado about nipples
Bless! All this nipple talk is so refreshing. I hope you are enjoying your bra-free day. I want to do a nipple photography project. What do you think? I haven’t thought about the who, how or when yet. Just a seed of an idea. Who would support it?
MASI, I all kinds of love this!
I’ve also reached this strange stage in my life where I won’t go out after I’ve taken off my bra. It’s so uncomfortable! So if I need milk – like you mentioned in your scenario- we’ll have to do without until the next day when the bra goes back on. The stares, comments and now snaps on World Star are not worth my peace and it’s a shame!
Free the nipple!
I feel so uncomfortable with guys noticing my boobs and worst of all commenting but they always do anyway. I know the bra pushes my boobs up in ways i dont like so i would rather walk out to get the milk without bra!! I love the feel of the skin against the skin….the softness and the carefree 🙂
I have always loved my breasts. I started out as a 34B and now after marriage, two kids and lots of pressing including breast feeding I am a healthy 36J. Loving every minute of them. Yes, they are sensitive especially before my period but I love them nonetheless. I was very lucky earlier on to learn from my mother that wearing a good bra was the best thing that I could do for myself. So I have always had to spend an arm and a leg to get properly kitted out. As for what they do for me sexually. Lets just say, you just have to press the buttons. Lol….
@Zawadi – a nipple photography project. Interesting. A feminist photographer will be great. It’ll be interesting to think about how this project can be more than just ‘bare nipples’. I’m thinking maybe it will be interesting to photograph ‘unusual’ nipples
@MASI – The struggle is real! Eye asem o
@Nana Akua – That sense of entitlement some men have really annoys me. Who gave you permission to comment on our bodies? Mtcheww
@Madam Butterfly – I am jealous! When I read about people who comes from having their nipples suckled I’m like “Arghhhh, why is the world so unfair”
Wow so sweet dearie well how about it being sucked gently massaged and rubbed.
Especially when it’s kneaded like bread. Let me know if you want your nipples gently sucked. BBM ping or WhatsApp will contact you
I never got with the nipple program until one night bae did this thing of rolling the nipples between forefinger and thumb. oooh! don’t know why but damn, it’s the hottest thing. feels amazing.
@Shungu – I am so envious of people who get off on their nipples being played with. Maybe one day I will have my own eureka moment 🙂
I get it. Heck, even I sexualise your boobs. #NoShame 😀
Lol @Nnenna, y’all can have it. I have no need of it
Post them to me then! I’ll frame them in resin and put them on my wall!
I enjoyed this as much as I did Iris Marion Young’s account in “Breasted Experience: The Look and The Feeling” by Iris Marion Young (see her collection of essays entitled, “On Female Body Experience”).
I was wondering if you have the same response or relationship when women carelessly touch your breasts, or is it only men who bring these feelings of unwanted contact?
I’ll look out for Young’s account, thanks for the referral.
LOL, I’m equally disinterested when women purposely or carelessly touch my breasts.
These are frank expressions from our lovely women. It’s high time we men respect the freedom of women freeing their boob’s and loving it. But there’s also that otherworldly ‘thing’that clouds a man’s sensibilities when confronted with a sumptuous sample of what nourished him so he goes ‘all senses’for a ‘launch’. Rivers flow in confusing mazes (in us) when it’s a woman and her breasts. Forgive our ‘bush’ appetite. Let me share a secret here…. I make them cum, just by dwelling on the boobs. Trust me, l barely touch it at all n she goes ballistic with punches to urge me on… But l lost her. Sad ain’t?