One of my friends met a guy on a flight from New York to Accra, they were sitting next to each other on the flight and the conversation flowed easily. On their return to their respective towns in Ghana they kept in touch, phonecalls, text messages, emails…the conversations started to heat up though…erotic emails and sexy texts.
Yesterday they arranged to meet up for drinks and late last night I got this text:
“ I thk de build up 2 de main event was 2 hyped. Erotic txts nd emails whch kind of gve me great xpctatns of unsurpasable erotic pleasure. But the reality was very ordinary.”
I don’t know about you but I can definitely identify with my friend. There are times when you can flirt with someone for literally years, tension builds up, sex almost becomes inevitable BUT when you do eventually do the horizontal tango you can’t help thinking “Is this it?”. The worst bit is when you have to reassure the person in question that “Really, it was fine“.
Has anybody else had a similar experience? Do you find yourself assuring your lover that sex was fine (or even great) when it was less than satisfactory?
9 comments On Great Sexual Expectations Not Met
I just think that some men are better writers than lovers. They can make love to you via text or phone call ….but not the real thing…!
Hiya!!!
Im a new follower on here and just wanted to say love it love it!!!
I think on more than one occasion after a build up of sexual tension the first meet or encounter can be mediocre. There was one time when i found myself thinking of one guy that surely he cant be that bad!!! After the third time “unlucky” I had to break of all ties.
Moral of the story – expectations should not be that high and one might be pleasantly surprised but on the other hand some people are just plain crappy in the sack!!!xxx
Since we only have half the story, i’d suggest a do-over for these two. Another meet. The dynamites might light up this time around.
That is because, personally, I have been in situations where I have relaxed at the start of first dates to see if she is all talk or if she is what she portrayed by email/ phone especially when she talks an unbelievably good game. I have never waited for the ship to sink though. I step up before the fuse starts to die out.
@Edward – Awww, isn’t that the sad truth?
@ Merrymary – Welcome! Thank you for the compliments, much appreciated. Hmmm, three times unlucky? Wow! No one can accuse you of not giving a chance
@Mike – After Merry mary’s three times unlucky scenario I don’t know how motivated my friend will be for a do-over. To be fair, I do think people (both men and women) tend to become better lovers once they get comfortable/familiar with you. Those first day nerves can be a killer! Love your ship & fuse analogy
Sex is to me is as a cheap as water these days. I have found myself in such a situation where it became a do or a die thing. The sexual tension got really intense to the extend that, we just gotta meet and shove it down but trust me, on the Dee-day, things turned different. She was all shivering like a wet chicken as the mere touch. I couldn’t bear it than to let her go. I later got some ice-cubes to cool my blue-balls down.. Won’t try this again cos’ I don’t know, where it might lead to.. !!!
Thats just my 50pesewas.. :))
@Kelvin – Oh Charle, “cheap as water”, that is serious oooo. I don’t even know what to say. “…shivering like a wet chicken”? why was that? She was over-excited, nervous? Did you really put ice cubes on your balls? I have always been suspiscious about the “blue balls” concept
I just think the kind of soceity we have (in Ghana) supresses sexual experimentation, and hence most people – most often women, perform poorly when involved in the act. Most men also see it as a ‘wicked affair’.
I’ve always felt that sex should be regarded as a form of art, which you try to excel in.
But who teaches you to have sex, and perform to your partners admiration?
@Elvis – No one, that’s the problem isn’t it. No one teaches you to have good sex. That was a huge part of my motivation is starting this blog, I wanted us to teach each other how to have good sex
This is a really interesting topic and relevant to today as well. You know, apart from this heated “text message” and “phone call” fore play, there are people who can really do everything to appeal to you, I mean they really look sexy and attractive and all, but when it comes to the main stuff, they are just bad news! They can dress to look damn sexy, complemented by their body shape and features but just the exact opposite in bed… And the worst is, you have to always assure the one that s/he was gr8! hmmmm asem ara nko!