Okay it happened, on my birthday *which is why I no fit forget am; imagine, my birthday *smh. Anyway we planned the day carefully, luxurious 4-star hotel, Chinese food, dancing and hot sex after it all. We got to the hotel, booked into one of their suites and started pre smooching. Got over a nice quickie then started getting ready for dinner at the restaurant. The evening went so well, I didn’t dance as much as I wanted because he was horny and wanted to get back to the hotel. We started off with the usual kissing, touching, squeezing, moaning and *all dem tins. He went down on me, made sure I was thoroughly satisfied, *you know then entered. He started hammering away, *thump, thump, thump. How many ladies here have felt that detachment from man whiles he’s banging it? I mean, he’s in the vag, he’s hard, he’s moving his hips but you look up and realize *this dude no dey here. He’s got this faraway look in his eyes and he’s just going. That bores me and dries up my lady business faster than the harmattan winds from South Tongu, so I started talking. You know, trying to get his attention. “D, do you like it? Ohhh don’t stop. Oohh yeahh”. *den tins some yeh.
He realizes oh wait, there’s another person in the room apart from me. *i wonder He looks down and mumbles a vague “yeah”. Continues hammering, I was drying up real fast so I started encouraging him to cum. I turned and twisted and moved my hips. *still dis guy dey detached. I started talking again “D, you wanna cum?” Okay granted pushing the man wasn’t fair but *mehn, I’m not a piece of log. So I asked again and he replied “oh yeah baby, I’m cuming. You’re so gooodd.” And he went into the usual orgasm spasms and leg shaking and all. Now mind you, this was boyfriend of 3 years, we threw the condom away sometime after a year so I knowwwww when he nuts in me. The dick pulsates, you feel the vein popping as the sperms shoot in. I FELT NOTHING. *natin! After a man cums, some sperm escape down, you need to wipe off the sticky stuff, NO STICKY STUFF. He said he came! He moaned and thrusted his hips, *all the signs dey der *natin ‘appen. I asked him the very next morning if he came *you know I’ll ask now and he insisted he did. *swearing his moda kanto. I insisted *like you know I will 😉 and he laughed. Now the excuse he gave for faking an orgasm was that, “well I felt you were tired and you wanted me to cum and I couldn’t cum so I had to”. Nobody should have to fake an orgasm. People who fake should know the psychological trauma they put their partners in. Now I’m walking around wondering if this good pussy’s gone rancid or *sontin. Worst sexual experience for me really; Especially since it was with someone I had an emotional connection with and expected some honesty. Y’all should stop faking mehn.
15 comments On Guest Contributor Korkor: He Faked It
My first reaction was to laugh and to say to myself: “Welcome to the real world of guys”.
My second was about all the ways in which we set ourselves up in these situations, when a simple three or four sentence exchange would make things right.
I’ve felt more and more in recent years that my previous mindset, too sex-focused, was not quite right, and that all I really needed in all that heaving and thrusting was someone I could talk to about everything.
But somehow the heaving and thrusting would get in the way.
If you can’t tell a guy you’ve been dating for three years that you’re not feeling him, that he doesn’t seem present, that if he isn’t present you’re not having fun yourself, then both of you have a lot of talking to do to each other…
Hahaha,this was a good one!especially the occasional pidgin,made the story flow.
Not to sound prude but babes 3yrs of screwing &there isn’t a hint of ring?or u don’t want it too?boyfriend is getting the milk for free so why buy the cow eh?
Maybe dude is tired of the relationship already that’s why now he’s starting 2 fake it.
U guys NEED to TALK ASAP
Hm. This looks more like the chap getting distracted or annoyed by the unnecessary comments by Korkor. Sex will always have actual shagging, fucking, banging or whatever you call it as part of it. So if a girl says she is demotivated by that then, how is the man expected to fully enjoy the union? I am beginning to think that unrealistic expectations are demanded from guys sometimes, and this is what could lead to dysfunction in either or both parties. Let us learn some more, girls.
@Abena – If you’re already having a good thing why spoil it? Marriage is not the be all and end all for everybody. Besides we (women) need to stop thinking of ourselves as cows 😛
@Roots4life Ehhhhh? What are you on?
lol @ Abena & Nana D on the cows & marriage. A guy-friend told me this last year (I kid you not) and I quote ” A single woman saying she doesn’t care about marriage is like a fat girl saying she’s happy with how she looks. They’re both lying”. Of course I strangled him after he said that but sometimes I think about it & wonder if it’s true. hmmm.
@Nana – It is just that if I place myself in the guy’s position and think about such comments being made in that moment, I can surely say that I would find nothing sensual about them. Mind you, she was not directing him, but more like rushing him. “D you wanna cum?”, why should I want to be told that? It is more like telling me, “Buddy I’ve had enough.”
I believe in shared control during sex from foreplay to penetration, if it goes that far. I will definitely be for anything that will make my woman happy. I will kiss, suck, lick, stroke and whatever at her direction, and if I know her well, from experience with her. I want to be told what works. I find it great and satisfying if a woman holds my hand and directs it to the spot she prefers. I like to hear the ‘stay there awhile’, ‘keep it steady’, ‘let’s go slower’, ‘please take all of me’, ‘don’t leave a piece’ comments. They tell me what the woman wants and I will try my best to comply. UNFORTUNATELY, some girls will not, but expect that the guy should know. That I find unfortunate and the basis of a lot of dysfunction that leads to several problems later.
Nana, I recently got myself a copy of a counseling manual published by the Lighthouse church, and after reading it I understood why it appears that rates of divorce among Christian couples in the charismatic churches are reducing and reducing fast. I cannot say that about other churches, especially those that have ‘elders’. There it appears that women are taught to be passive during sex, but in the Lighthouse manual, I saw how counselors were encouraged to virtually ‘teach’ sex and sensuality. In it women are advised to open up about what works for them, talk about it, accommodate where possible, and object where necessary. For me it is totally wrong to have the wrong expectations about guys. Some girls would not believe it, but most guys do not want a ‘log’ or ‘cadaver’. I will want a woman, a being with thoughts and feelings with whom I can communicate. Tell me what to do and I will do it, but seriously, do not pretend, ‘cos it will upset me. The guy in Korkor’s post must definitely have realized he was not connecting and ended it by play acting along. But had Korkor, say, stopped him, and done something else, wild for her and equally sensual for him, I believe they both would have ended up in fun. Sensuality is not something that one is born with. It can be learnt, and I believe couples should learn it. I just discussed this in my office and a guy here is just telling me of a former girl of his who he loved succumbing to because she placed a lot of emphasis on directing him on how to please her, and that she is the best he ever encountered. That is what I am talking about. It takes two to really really tango.
thank y’all for the commentsssss roots4life took the thing personal, even further to advertise a religious doctrine’s success sexually. now i dont want to digress but @roots4life when you state such a glaring fact, you must be ready to back it with figures. the success of a marriage or sexual relationship has nothing to do with a religious doctrine whatsoever. i agree that it is about communication though, no matter your religious disposition.
back to the matter at hand.
@kofi we are not perfect, we do not always ‘communicate’ as we preach all the time. especially when the relationship moves into certain gears. he could have also told me he wasnt in the mood, for example. then we will avoid the fake bit. it is not all the time that a man should place himself in a position where he’s directed. you can be attentive as well, listen to the movement in your lover’s body, be at that place in that time specifically
@Abena thanks for the read. well not every relationship leads to marriage my love. some are just what they are. marriage is good though, if you make the right choice that is 🙂
@roots4life when you feel the disconnect with someone, you cannot solve it by changing sexual positions. you have to stop, cuddle and discuss like matured adults. trying to bring the person back into the mood right there can be very frustrating
@Nana and Ekuba i believe marriage is good but not meant for everyone. some people are just born to ride it solo. just like the way we have geniuses. doesnt mean you should be miserable without it
to round up, the relationship ended due to unforeseen circumstances. haha 😛
Sorry Korkor, but I am not making a religious argument at all. My issue is that we spend little or no time in educating our partners about our bodies. I only expressed my joy about the example of that church in working against that. I still do believe that you should educate your partner about what is right for you and I believe that if he loves you he would comply and learn to give you what you want. To me your post appeared to suggest that you expected something from him which you were not getting. My problem is that he may not know, and he could also be in a like position to you and also failed to find out what works for you. Should you two choose to learn about each other I believe you will do each other better. Leaving things to assumptions will not help. I hope I have made my position clearer now, or?
@Korkor – I agree that when you are not connecting it may not be worth continuing. I possibly misconstrued ‘connecting’ with ‘feeling the moment’ , I hope you get me. But I still say, talk about it. Then or later. You got his reasoning later as you indicated in the post. The question is whether you understood his standpoint and would want to work at it with him, or you would leave it and expect that he should know. All the same, I do believe that it will be better for you next time. Enjoy yourself. Life is too short.
@Roots4life – Bless your heart. Thank you for the detailed explanation. I understand what you were saying now. I think the Lighthouse leaflet sounds interesting. The reality is a lot of Ghanaians are yay high in church activities so good for them if the churches are starting to discuss sexuality openly 🙂 I could say a lot more about what churches could do around sexuality but let me not go there today 😛
@roots4life you’ve made your position clear dearie. it is all about communication. he wasn’t faking for the entire period we were together. we had mind blowing unforgettable sex as well with all the freaky stuff, just how we both liked it :P. he knows exactly what i like but that day, he was tuned out. haven’t you felt sexually disconnected due to one reason or the other? i have. the post is show that men feel disconnected too. men fake it too. it happens. that’s why i indicated how long we’d been dating. 🙂
Oh nice vivid descriptions. I want to ask how is sex usually with him?
May be he was not “feeling” you that day?
Korkor and Roots.. just applauding your confident honesty. Korkor, you are absolutely right, we are not perfect. I really don’t think I’ve had a really open conversation about our sex lives with anyone I’ve been with… It just doesn’t seem to happen… Maybe I come from a generation that just didn’t do that. But let’s hope that this post’s lesson endures for all of us imperfect souls.
@Dela thank you for the comment. Sex with him was always on point. Mine blowing, explored positions mehn. The faking happened once
@Nana Darkoa the churches do teach sex. Just that they dont do it when we’re young. But the ‘ready-to-marry’ people get all the freakiy info. My sis told me about her counselling sesions before marriage, i was quite surprised. She was even advised that sex comes first before church
@Kofi Ametewee thank you too for your shared thoughts. I agree, hopefullly we can solve that problem before we expire o_O. Communication is always important