‘No fingers in my vagina please’, says Guest Contributor Chili

First he kisses you on the lips. If he is any good he places his lips on yours first then parts your lips and seeks your tongue with his tongue.  If you are any good you respond with equal gusto and input. While your lips are relishing each other’s and your tongues probing further,your hands are feeling and caressing. If you are any good you start by cupping his face in your palms and as you progress, moving those hands down his neck, his chest, his back, while simultaneously freeing his shirt or any restrictions on them. If he is good he would have held you in a warm, tight embrace, with one hand cradling your head. And as he kisses you more urgently, his hand would move down, unzipping, or untying, or unbuttoning your outfit, feeling for your breasts and feeling your breasts. Pause.

You tear yourselves apart to cast off all inhibitions- and all clothing. If he’s good- and you are patient- he undresses you, kissing each exposed body area or body part, tenderly. He lingers on your breasts, licking the nipples, cupping them gingerly. He kisses your stomach, your navel. He stops short of your pelvic area. If he is good he undresses himself quickly and efficiently, flinging his clothes with abandon, never taking his eyes off your face. If you are good you undress him, taking off his shirt, running your hands on his chest, on his nipples, and gently nibbling on them.


You both lie down; whether he gently leads you to the bed, or roughly tosses you into it, or you both fall into it, is irrelevant. If he is good he kisses your lips some more, and with his lips traces his way to your breasts giving each equal attention, then to your belly button and down to your jeans or skirt. If he’s good he undoes your belt buckle or your buttons in a flash, lifts your hips up slightly and peels off your jeans. If he’s really good he begins afresh with your breasts and your nipples, with slightly more pressure, as if oblivious to the crazy orchestra playing downstairs. Finally his fingers race downwards, finding their way to your clitoris. He probes… What?! STOP!!!


I HATE fingers! Never understood what the hell they were doing in my most delicate, most sensitive, precious area. To me fingers in my vagina are like two blind men leading each other: stumbling, falling, lacking bearing. What are you looking for? And if you find it will you know? Any time a lover places his fingers in my pussy my mother instinct kicks in. I am thinking,’ did you wash those hands, what was the last thing you touched, will you wash your hands afterwards’. Some men use their fingers to simulate the penis, thrusting and prodding somewhat strategically- I could have done that myself, Sir. Fingers are for caressing the lips of my vagina, and gently holding them open so you can gently flick your tongue on my clit and drive me wild. If I let you, fingers – one finger- is to stick in my ass while you eat my pussy and I writhe and moan. Other than that fingers are abrupt, and rude, and cold. And a turn-off.

And that’s why I hate fingers. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Photography by Bob Pixel
Photography by Bob Pixel

13 comments On ‘No fingers in my vagina please’, says Guest Contributor Chili

  • I mean… I never thought of it that way. Fingers are always welcome in my vagina, but now I’m wondering if I should forbid them.

  • Fingers. They’re “cold” depending on how they’re used. Cold when they start…passionate when they’re introduced about 70% of the way. I love fingers. I love fingers when in the throes of passion. When he’s licked to near ecstasy. Fingers just complete it for me. Because by the time he’s licked me to that point, I’m yearning to be filled but I don’t want our ‘lips’ to part either. The simultaneous licking & ‘finger fucking’ followed by proper penetration on the verge of orgasm does it for me everytime. Maybe it’s because I’m not tense about whether or not the hands are clean. His near OCD means his hands are usually cleaner than my otherwise delicate vavajay. Win all round. 🙂

  • A man’s hands can be a great turn-on for me when they are clean, smooth or slightly callused with neatly trimmed nails … just imagine the things they can do to you!! The fingers? Never more than two at a time, never jammed in roughly and never inserted in the third option 🙂

  • I really used to hate fingers too. Never understood what they were meant to achieve. Once had a lover who couldn’t get an erection for whatever reason and he’ll push his fingers inside me and literally screw me dry. All the while I’ll be wondering if we were ever gonna get ‘jiggy’.
    But my last lover… He did something special with his fingers. Never quite got what was going on but I had several orgasms around his fingers…

    • I agree with Miss K. When used appropriately, fingers can elicit quite the climax. But the BIGGEST turn off for me is when a man relies on them exclusively. Eat some watermelon or take a pill. Fingers are for prelims, not the main show!

  • Wow! I had no idea that some women hated fingers in them. I once read a comment on this blog from a man who said that his wife hated being fingered but I thought it was because she was a prude, I never figured that some women just hate fingers in their vaj. Me, I LOVE, love and abso-fucking-lutely LOVE fingers in my pussy. Infact, I ADORE being fingered! With some clit licking, it’s the number one act that always makes me climax. Satisfaction guaranteed-everytime lol 🙂

  • Hate fingers. Your fingers will NEVER be able to compete with mine anyway so why try? Get to licking brother!! At least you are lucky I cannot reach down there with my tongue as well or it will become ‘You don’t gotta go home, but you gotta get on outta here’.

  • Meanwhile Nana, your friend Bob Pixel is KILLING me. Please could you give me his address or show him this comment? I would love an image for a book cover. He is killing me softly, hard, in every which way with his crazily creative eye. I love him. I want to marry him…or her. Please, connect us for the love of God.

  • I love this piece! Very very well put. But the comments are extra special. Very educative for me. Nice story

  • Finger lickin good…popeye’s.

  • How do i get to your G-spot while sucking&licking on your clit if i dont use my fingers?I also discovered a little nobe inside the vagina right behind the clit that makes my girl cum bowlfulls if i press hard in circular motions.Anyone tried this?

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