I was incredibly stressed. Everything was going according to schedule but every time I looked around I couldn’t help but notice things that were not as perfect as I imagined. Chairs weren’t sitting right. I hadn’t yet unpacked the refreshments and people were already streaming in and I knew they’d want a drink or snacks to distract them from the nerves of attending a kink party. In the corner of my eye I caught Snow walking into the room, as …
Author: Kgothatso Motshele
I am sitting on the balcony of our family home in Jinja, Uganda, looking at the River Nile right at the bottom of our garden. This spot and this view has truly added a lot of …
We’ve spent a considerable amount of time in the previous pieces unpacking non-monogamy and discussing how to navigate jealousy, envy and compersion in these dynamics. The idea of managing multiple relationships or seeing yourself share your …
There is a ton of material out there that advocates for the use of pleasure products and toys, and how instrumental they can be in the journey of exploring pleasure. Toys have empowered a lot of …
Squirting: What’s all the hype? Thank the pleasure gods that for the last few decades, the myth on female orgasms has been dispelled! The conversations now are moving towards exploring the pleasure potential of female-bodied people …
Very often, when people hear about polyamory, their first reaction is to ask how it is possible to love and live like this with all that we come with as humans. While it hasn’t always been …
In the first part of this series, we discussed differentiating between envy and jealousy, and how it’s possible to view these emotions as opportunities to identify what you may be lacking or desiring in your relationship. …
“But how do you deal with jealousy?” This is the commonest question I’ve had in all my years living as an out non-monogamous person, and in my work as an intimacy and sex coach. I hear …
Like with any relationship, monogamous or not, safety is a big thing that needs careful attention and thought. The responsibility to maintain safety increases when you are intimately involved with more than one person; simply …
Non-monogamy has been a hot topic in the last few years as we see more and more people claim this part of their identity and share their lived experiences with the world. Like with so many …
Ethical non-monogamy can be defined as participating in more than one relationship in an ethical way. “Ethical” implies that everyone involved is consenting and aware they are in a relationship where non-monogamy features, they have discussed …