I am defining a “good” relationship as one in which both parties are happy and fulfilled. However being in a “good” relationship does not always guarantee a great sex life (although a great sex life might be one of your indicators for a good relationship). So here are my thoughts on how to have great sex in a relationship:
- Remember that sex is important! Sometimes sex gets left on the back burner, what with the demands of work, children (if you have them) and all the various other commitments you may have. You can even try making “nooky dates” to guarantee that you do have sex.
- Flip the script. I know I have said this before on previous posts but this is especially important in a relationship. You know what your partner likes by now so you automatically start to go down on her, for example. That can be boring if this is always your first move so do something different … give her a massage, wear a scandalous piece of lingerie, try some body paint, have sex in the car, on the beach …I’m sure you get the idea.
- Do not have penetrative sex. Yes, I know some of you may be thinking “what’s the point?” but seriously we sometimes have sex with penetration as the goal which can detract so much from all the pleasure that can be derived along the way. So tease your partner, enjoy touching, feeling, licking, sucking…but no penetration. Okay, maybe after a looooong time.
- Let your partner know when you are pissed off with them. When I am angry with my partner I cannot connect with the person physically. It just doesn’t happen. Does anyone else experience this? And I so do not like “make up sex”. I am still pissed off, what are you trying to have sex with me for?
- Do go away on a dirty weekend somewhere. For me this is idyllic. I pack all my sexy lingerie, toys and any other accessories I may need. A beach resort is great! Sex, beach and food. What more could a girl want?
- Remember you have a great body whatever size and shape you are. Besides candle light is always flattering and romantic.
- Have sex at unexpected times and in unexpected places…kind of linked to point number 2.
- Be faithful to your partner. This is so important it should have been tip number 1. Finding out that your partner has cheated on you destroys not just great sex but a good relationship. It also increases your risk to the numerous sexually transmitted diseases that are out there.So for all those out there in relationships what can you add to this list? For the singletons, what will you put on your list if you were to write a piece on “Great sex tips for singletons”?
6 comments On Great sex tips for people who are in Good Relationships
i would say have fun with it… laugh, play, tease!
YOu covered them all, girl! But sometimes building up to the sex is great. When you are out, tease him with lots of body contact. By the time you get home, he is sooo ready to play. The only problem is that he may want to leave and come home earlier than you want, because you got him that excited.
I’m a big fan of makeup sex. Whenever he annoys me, I always remind myself that he did not mean to. And I have made mistakes in the past that he has forgiven me for as well. As mad as I am at him, if he rolls over and cuddles up with me, I know he is sorry and all is forgiven. I try to forgive easily cause he does that for me too even when I am WRONG WRONG WRONG.
Oh, the sex with no penetration part. Interesting how intimate you feel with your partner. I call that a “naked nap.” Sometimes we do that before we go to bed and the naked nap always ends up being more than a nap!
Anon 1 – I feel you!
Anon 2 – I love the idea of a naked nap…but why is it that guys do not get that naked naps are just that…why does it need to be more than a nap. The nap on its own can be very nice on it’s own
@Nana am with you on the sex and anger bit.Can’t get frisky when I am angry. Except for anger my tip will be occationaly allow yourself to have it when you don’t want to e.g. too tired,headache etc
Its a great pick me up
Anon 3 – True! Good sex can be a great cure for tiredness, stress, etc. Ta!
Wow! Excellent guidance. I agree with all you have said.