The first step in having a truly appreciative ‘cunnilingual’ experience – as in most things concerning women – is in the mind.
You have to stop. Just stop.
Stop thinking about how many women your partner has been with, stop thinking about whether your period is due, stop thinking about how to fake an arch of the back so that your stomach seems flatter than it is, stop wondering if you should turn off the lights, if you’re too loud, whether he would like it if you moaned, what you ate for lunch…shit, what if you have gas at the wrong time? You definitely shouldn’t have eaten that extra wrap of moin-moin! Your mother always told you you were a greedy little pig and now she is right, you can definitely feel a fart coming on and now he will dump you and you’re not getting any younger, you little cousin is getting married at the weekend and now everyone will ask you if you guys are getting married oh God you knew it was a bad idea to invite him, what were you thinking?!!!!!!
You get the point. Stop it.
The second thing you must do, is prepare. I’m not going to go into details like cleanliness and douching and shit – excuse the pun. By preparation, I mean do whatever you need to do to make you feel good. Do you love it when you paint your nails? Have a bath? Work out? Does it make you feel or nice and mellow when you brush (or scratch!) your hair/head? Maybe you like a little bit of self-loving? Go ahead and do it. Take every stitch of clothing off before your partner joins you and just touch your body. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy being you. If your breast can reach your mouth, toss a nipple in there.
Now, for the good part. You partner is there, tongue at the ready. Splay. Open your legs as wide as they can go. Don’t be afraid to move his/her head where you want it, don’t be afraid to give instruction. Demand more friction if you need it – a beard is good for this. Have them eat you out with their whole face; chin, lips, nose, head. If your partner is not quite hitting the spot, SHOW them what you like; tug on your clit, slap it, rub it the way you like it and they’ll follow. Try not to take over though, they’re supposed to be giving you pleasure after all. It’s not a solo session (more on this later).
Do not prevent your body from moving in ways with which you are unfamiliar. If you’re enjoying it, the sounds you make will sound nothing like you hear in porn. It will sound like a cat being strangled, like the death throes of a rabid dog but your partner will love it because it is all you and all TRUE.
When it’s all done, don’t be afraid to taste you if it’s what you feel like. Don’t apologise for feeling sleepy – you’ll reciprocate when you wake up. The most important thing is to love your pussy, heck, love loving your pussy in whatever form it comes in; large and fleshy like a carnivorous plant, small and neat like a shell and everything in between. Love it and they will too.
7 comments On Guest Contributor Nnenna Marcia: How to have a truly ‘cunnilingual’ experience
Nnenna, my upcoming wedding, instead of Bible readings-I am going to have my bridesmaid read this out loud! It’s empowering and kinda hot!!
Haha! Are there going to be children at this wedding? Cue comments like ‘Mummy? Why is that lady talking about eating my pussy cat? I don’t like her.”
Lmho@ e kids saying “why is thelady talking about eating my pussy cat..”
Nice piece. Cant wait to read the one on ‘solo session’
*the kids*
Well said dear, lovely
Sex is not just an act it’s an expression of who you are. Until people fully come to terms with this realization, they will never reap the full benefits of, or completely enjoy sex. Totally agree with you on the preparation part. You’ve got to give yourself space and time to be you, and to be comfortable to reveal it to someone else through sex. … But these are just one girl’s thoughts.
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